“In a desperate bid to absorb ambition, to catch the same waves as high achievers, you risk becoming mere satellites: small, rotating bodies constantly reflecting the light of someone else’s star, but never finding the space to let your own light shine.”
People want to be the high achievers, one of the ones who made it, but they never stop to ask why. People want freedom but never stop to consider how or why they want to get that freedom. As Nietzsche once said “freedom is the will to be responsible for ourselves.” And as you said, we need to be responsible for our own path and not just default to someone else’s.
You work, you have a family, you have hobbies etc. - if you don't, you should.
If you're in a headlong rush towards wealth and power, your personal ties will probably suffer.
If you're obsessive about your fitness (as a hobby,) your career will likely suffer.
And so on...
I look at life as a 3 legged stool - health, wealth and relationships.
If you want to sit firmly on the ground, you should balance all 3. Yes there will be times when you'll have to do some acrobatics and will lean more heavily on one side, but that's not achievable long term - you'll eventually fall.
Look for mentors in all 3 of these categories. It will help you gain perspective.
I personally have business people I really admire, family people and triathletes. Diversity. Perspective.
“Progress means getting nearer to the place you want to be. And if you have taken a wrong turn, then to go forward does not get you any nearer.
If you are on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; and in that case the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive man.” —C.S. Lewis
Yeah. Done this twice in my life. So far. You’d think I’d learned my lesson about achieving someone else’s dream the first time. It’s frighteningly easy to wake up in Budapest after giving a keynote to the annual meeting of a multinational conglomerate only to realize the reality of research/rehearse/repeat every week for the rest of my life was a hell of my own making.
Figure out what you want first, then figure out who you need to surround yourself with. Amen.
The best life advice someone should’ve given me in my twenties would’ve been to spend more time in a monastery meditating on what *I* actually want out of life. Closest I’m likely to get now, though, is sitting in the hot tub and staring at the cloudy night sky to wonder where the decades went.
“Sadly, only 1% of the population are psychopaths. Which means that statistically speaking, your humanity is probably holding you back from achieving your true potential”
There is a difference between peoples. Some are content to be corporate drones, think nothing of commuting 2-3 hours a day, and look forward to retiring on their 65th birthday.
The people writing comments here are ones who didn't like what inevitability handed them, and deliberately made a change.
Even though I loved my occupation as a transportation engineer at a engineering consulting firm, I grew frustrated, because I wanted to make things better in terms of how transportation engineering is carried out, but engineering is inherently conservative, and I clued in that I could never have an impact.
When the opportunity came, I became a technical writer in the then-brand-new field of computer-aided design, where, being a writer, I could (and did) have an impact.
As I told my children, "The Grabowskis are not shop-keepers!"
I suspect the reason you see so many people trying to focus on success at the expense of their humanity is an attempt to emulate the inhumane way our cultures corporate winners appear to succeed without having to deal with the fallout of their actions.
I think your point holds true for any type of “group-think” though, whether the group’s success is financially oriented or culturally oriented. At the end of the day, isn’t it healthier to surround yourself with as many different views and ideas as you can? And important to be as compassionate with other people’s thoughts, ideas, and beliefs as you can?
Otherwise, won’t any “group-think” necessarily demote the needs of those outside of the “group” to further its own aims and agenda.
Great piece, Adam. This hit,
“In a desperate bid to absorb ambition, to catch the same waves as high achievers, you risk becoming mere satellites: small, rotating bodies constantly reflecting the light of someone else’s star, but never finding the space to let your own light shine.”
People want to be the high achievers, one of the ones who made it, but they never stop to ask why. People want freedom but never stop to consider how or why they want to get that freedom. As Nietzsche once said “freedom is the will to be responsible for ourselves.” And as you said, we need to be responsible for our own path and not just default to someone else’s.
exactly right
Diversity is key here.
Not one person is ONE thing.
You work, you have a family, you have hobbies etc. - if you don't, you should.
If you're in a headlong rush towards wealth and power, your personal ties will probably suffer.
If you're obsessive about your fitness (as a hobby,) your career will likely suffer.
And so on...
I look at life as a 3 legged stool - health, wealth and relationships.
If you want to sit firmly on the ground, you should balance all 3. Yes there will be times when you'll have to do some acrobatics and will lean more heavily on one side, but that's not achievable long term - you'll eventually fall.
Look for mentors in all 3 of these categories. It will help you gain perspective.
I personally have business people I really admire, family people and triathletes. Diversity. Perspective.
Well said. A favorite quote:
“Progress means getting nearer to the place you want to be. And if you have taken a wrong turn, then to go forward does not get you any nearer.
If you are on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; and in that case the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive man.” —C.S. Lewis
Yeah. Done this twice in my life. So far. You’d think I’d learned my lesson about achieving someone else’s dream the first time. It’s frighteningly easy to wake up in Budapest after giving a keynote to the annual meeting of a multinational conglomerate only to realize the reality of research/rehearse/repeat every week for the rest of my life was a hell of my own making.
Figure out what you want first, then figure out who you need to surround yourself with. Amen.
The best life advice someone should’ve given me in my twenties would’ve been to spend more time in a monastery meditating on what *I* actually want out of life. Closest I’m likely to get now, though, is sitting in the hot tub and staring at the cloudy night sky to wonder where the decades went.
you and me both! (although I didn't make it as far as you did, every thing else!)
“Sadly, only 1% of the population are psychopaths. Which means that statistically speaking, your humanity is probably holding you back from achieving your true potential”
https://tempo.substack.com/p/new-training-course-by-darktriad
There is a difference between peoples. Some are content to be corporate drones, think nothing of commuting 2-3 hours a day, and look forward to retiring on their 65th birthday.
The people writing comments here are ones who didn't like what inevitability handed them, and deliberately made a change.
Even though I loved my occupation as a transportation engineer at a engineering consulting firm, I grew frustrated, because I wanted to make things better in terms of how transportation engineering is carried out, but engineering is inherently conservative, and I clued in that I could never have an impact.
When the opportunity came, I became a technical writer in the then-brand-new field of computer-aided design, where, being a writer, I could (and did) have an impact.
As I told my children, "The Grabowskis are not shop-keepers!"
I suspect the reason you see so many people trying to focus on success at the expense of their humanity is an attempt to emulate the inhumane way our cultures corporate winners appear to succeed without having to deal with the fallout of their actions.
I think your point holds true for any type of “group-think” though, whether the group’s success is financially oriented or culturally oriented. At the end of the day, isn’t it healthier to surround yourself with as many different views and ideas as you can? And important to be as compassionate with other people’s thoughts, ideas, and beliefs as you can?
Otherwise, won’t any “group-think” necessarily demote the needs of those outside of the “group” to further its own aims and agenda.
Blind ambition without any morality can only result in corruption.
another thing we can blame on the death of god, honestly
Nietzsche would agree.